


Just Out of Reach

by Highlander_II



Series: None Goes His Way Alone [67]
Category: House M.D.
Genre: Community: 100_situations, F/M, neutral
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-05-12
Updated: 2009-05-12
Packaged: 2017-10-12 12:35:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/124876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Highlander_II/pseuds/Highlander_II
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>House considers if the drugs making him neutral would have been beneficial earlier in his recovery. Season 1</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Out of Reach

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [](http://www.livejournal.com/userinfo.bml?user=100_situations)[100_situations](http://www.livejournal.com/users/100_situations/), based on the table in [this post](http://highlander-ii.dreamwidth.org/299704.html#cutid1).
> 
>  
> 
> I've maintained canon events through Season 5 with one exception – House never started seeing 'dead people' and did not end up in the asylum. That's where the divergence occurs and the 'AU timeline' begins.
> 
>  
> 
> All of these 100 ficlets were written starting in May of 2009 and finishing by June/July of that same year.

_The drugs don't make me high, they make me neutral._

He remembers saying that. It was still true. He wonders if it would have been true when Stacy was around enough to make her stay. He wonders until he realizes that he had the drugs then, but he had been so angry, the drugs had no chance of making him neutral.

He thinks he should have been less of an ass, less withdrawn, less grouchy, less angry. He thinks he should have been more open, more understanding, more available to her, more - everything that he wasn't.

He also thinks that, as horrible as he had been to Stacy, she hadn't been entirely blameless either. Not just for making the decision about his leg, but for not giving him the space he needed to work through the injury on his own before leaning on someone else. Though, his leaning was different than that of most people, typically much more subtle.

She also hadn't let him be angry at her. She'd argued with him incessantly that she'd saved his life. Maybe she had, but he hadn't wanted to hear that and he hadn't let her argue at him long before he'd leave the room. He'd needed the anger to fuel a part of his recovery and she'd told him to get over it and move on.

He is aware, now, that most of that had been his sheer stubbornness, but he hadn't cared then. He only sometimes cares now. He doesn't typically dwell in the 'what ifs' of the past - as Wilson had eloquently pointed out once before but, every so often, a random thought will send him back to think of a way to hold on to Stacy. Neutrality might have worked. If only he'd been able to find it.


End file.
